What should I reply?
The best reply is rarely the cleverest one. It is the one that says what you actually mean, in a tone you can stand behind tomorrow.
Start freeDecide what you want before you write
Reassurance, clarity, distance and repair need completely different messages. Most bad replies happen because the writer wanted two of those at once.
Four tones that work
- Warm: keeps connection, lowers the stakes
- Direct: asks the real question in one sentence
- Casual: matches their energy without disappearing
- Boundary-setting: states what you will and will not do
What to avoid
Deliberate delays, engineered jealousy, and 'strategy' generally. It creates a relationship that only survives while you keep performing.
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